I awake suddenly from a nightmare, drenched in terror and sweat. It’s come to me again. What do I do with this? I have dreams of my family dying, of the future in a post-apocalyptic dystopia. Robots everywhere. Bees extinct. The dreams are tragic and difficult and I don’t know how to navigate why I’m having them. My mom says they’re just nightmares; “do you know how many times I had nightmares of my Grandmother dying and gosh, she lived to 75.”
I’m not convinced. My dreams take hold of me, these ... nightmares. As I was just typing ‘nightmares’ my phone autocorrected to ‘blessings’. Are they blessings? Warnings? What?
I cry for hours in my bed, tear soaked & mascara stained sheets. I’m training myself in how to be lonely while alone. That it’s ok. It is ok.
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